With the growing obesity rates in America, we must take a look at the benefits of becoming obese. There’s always a silver lining to every cloud, right? So, let’s start this journey, you and I, through the brighter side of life.
If your are obese, and according to the CDC there’s a good chance you are, you will have the opportunity to learn your spouse’s “dishonest face”. We all know we have one, the facial expression that you try to hide when telling an untruth. How, you say, will being amongst the rising obesity rates help you to memorize that particular expression of your partner’s? It’s simple, once you’ve come to terms with your hindquarters never being the size of a Hollywood starlet’s, ask your life partner, “does this make my butt look big?”. He will weigh his options for a few seconds, realize this is a trick question and immediately tell you “no”, regardless of what he really thinks. He will do this because he loves you, and as to spare himself the verbal lashing he may get if he says otherwise. We mustn’t forget either that if he answers to the affirmative, he will undoubtedly have to wait at least another hour before departing.
With that said, I ask myself, is this why the policeman and the doughnut go so well together? Do they form some sort of cosmic human lie detector? If so, then I applaud them. Law enforcement officers may contribute to the growing obesity rates in America, being unselfish with each Krispy Kreme, to become more in tune with their corrupt detainees bouts of dishonesty.
In conclusion, a human lie detector may not be the only benefit of being obese. Finding time to exercise is not quite as difficult, a short walk should do the trick! If you’re ever stranded in the cold, you’ll have plenty of insulation. Lastly, being obese tends to help you have a more cheery disposition. You know you’ve had that last piece of chocolate and it’s not just sitting there tempting you, thus you feel awfully good. Just as I said earlier, we must take what life gives us and make the best of it. I always try to look at the bright side, no reason being depressed over things we cannot control. I make plenty of mistakes of my own volition that can cause depression!
